SuperMudz!

FAIL

GAH! It is not cool having noooo moneys. You guys know what I’m on about, I don’t even have enough to spring for the pub.

Yesterday, on Day T-minus 4, I couldn’t find a charger for my camera battery (in the shop) and after my $25 lot of shopping I couldn’t even afford the crappy $90 camera on sale.

I had to break that Unbreakable Rule of JB Hi Fi, of walking out without BUYING anything. There is apparently a curse over the place with Pirates of the Caribbean proportions, cursing casual browsers into bargain hungry zombies of Hey Let’s Get This! Might As Well!

This has prompted me to reschedule my BUFF BODY BUILDING RECORD AND CHRONICLES. Yesterday after I finished blogging, I threw the weights around a bit anyway, but I’ve decided that I want to start the Charting starting from New Year Day 1 BOOYAH!

Today is New Year T-minus 3!

Hey! That reminds me! I totally have never done the New Year’s thing before either! I’m going to scope me out a place or person, and do that whole American countdown thing, do we do that in New Zealand? If not, I’ll import the custom, cos I LIKE it! A Full-On-Kiss Without Consequences is enough to get me unzipping my pants and getting real comfortable in this chair.

Hah! LOL how that subject somehow brought me around to telling you guys that SJ LOVES ME! She’s my Skype buddy! Totally had to whip that out in public.

You guys see the connection I subtly made there? Didya didya?

Gad, yesterday and today, my sleeping has been totally weird. Yesterday I randomly crashed on the floor, that’s right, the FLOOR! From about 10.00 in the morning till 3.00 in the afternoon, whereupon I dragged my grainy eyed corpse from the ground and moved it the necessary two steps to reach the chair that governs my internet habits. Then after a truly mind confusing conversation with multiple people I went SHOPPING. As I speak I am munching on a glorious collaboration of multigrain bread, tomato, mayonnaise, lettuce, beetroot, crumbed fish, T. Sauce, cheese, onion and egg. It is the food of the GODS. I eat this all day. I buy a full tray (40) of eggs, and it’s gone in like a week.

Don’t let people tell you that’s bad for you! I’m am living proof that it’s great!

I got my Curriculum Vitae done yesterday! It totally kicks ass! “So fast you wouldn’t even FEEL it!” Okay, that movie sucked, but I liked the quote. Still gotta remember the dates that I worked on various jobs and the like, does Male Prostitution class as a skill? I wanted to use my first (and only so far) job on a film set for work reference, but the lady still hasn’t replied to my text. o.O

Probably not a good sign! I thought she loved me? L

This song is really raping my mind! I’ve been playing it on repeat since I got up. I was dubious about it at first because it wasn’t the version I remembered, but it’s buzzy as man! I remember playing this song to a girl in college, and HONESTLY I got COMPLETELY ambushed by how quickly she just MELTED in a goddam INSTANT! She flipped from being angry at my insensitivity, to thinking I was the most sensitive thing on the earth for liking this song! I capitalised on it. Fully.

Just so you guys and girls understand me, I am NOT sensitive. Don’t even THINK it! Like most things, this song failed to affect me in any way emotionally. But she didn’t need to know that. So BOOYAH! Assholism for the win!  :D Ah, Sam you trusting fool.

This is the one I remember: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qj62HiLk-Ag&feature=related

Can’t find the remix I’m listening to on the old Ew-tube. Which is funny because it was the only audio track version I could find on IMesh! Go figure!

And yes, I’m still using Imesh. Shaddap.

It made me LOL cause I keep thinking how much it sounds like a love affair between a stoner and his pot!

Anyways, you noity people you!

WOOT! SJ JUST CAME ONLINE! GONNA FIND OUT IF SHE WORKS DOWN THE ROAD! Don’t tell her, but I want to glue porn magazines all over her car.

Wait, she reads these blogs doesn’t she?

… o.O

Fail For The Win.

I’m trying to coerce her into a strip game right now. I can feel the barriers crumbling!

God my pants feel so constricted right now. Hey have you guys seen ‘Enemy of the State’? With Will Smith and Gene Hackman? Awesome movie!

Lol. For the last ten minutes or so, I have been endeavouring, with two bits of blu tack attached on both ends, to fling a butter knife from the swing of my pants onto the wall and make it stick. It stuck for a few seconds before!

Obviously I need a little more swing and a little more stick.

TRUTH OR DARE! WOOT!

I’m trying to woo her with tales of dead animals. WIN!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ybNVLFVZ6hI&feature=fvw

What every guy out on the town needs.

It find it so uncool just how many beers I’m missing.

Okay, this just confuses and worries me. I took a woody to bed with me last night to play with, and when I woke up there was TWO empty bottles next to my bed! I’m drinking in my sleep!

The dubiously good news is that thanks primarily to SJ, I now am officially low on anything that could possibly induce an altered state of balance in me.

Damn you SJ, these Tuis have messed with my head!

I have I think, only two left. I find this most distressing. I was really enjoying this random drunkenness without purpose thing.

NO I DON”T KNOW WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR GODDAM TV! Can you believe this?

Two jokers just randomly showed up at my back door (euphemism alert), and started pumping me for any knowledge I might be harbouring on the current location of their fag vibe enhancing boxmobile along with whatever materials of dubious nature they also are missing.

Just cos I’m Maori don’t mean I know where your shit is! Do they think I’ve got some sort of connections to the underworld? That for a little under-the-table dealings and whispered conversations I’ll tell them that I heard a rumour from a friend of a friend of a friend and that for an extra 15% I might know where it is?

I am proud to report, I have written two more chapters of my novel! I’m sure you are all just STAGGERED to hear this! You are probably telling all your friends right now, and ringing up news agencies to spread the word!

I was planning to hit the town this week, but my under-100 dollar bank account is not too conducive to this plan. Lol! Since all my family is working, and I obviously don’t have any friends, I was going to hit the town like the Lone Ranger. I’m totally still going to do this, and tell you guys how I go!

Heh heh, I so rollilolled at myself yesterday. I am such a drip. I wanted to see how the hell you could video record yourself using a webcam (Sam and Nate said it was possible). I thought I found the ticket with my acer arcade.

I spent literally two hours, from 8.00 a.m to 10.00 a.m staring at myself on my webcam saying and doing whatever the hell popped into my head, and I’m not gonna lie, it got a little weird from time to time. At 10.00 I popped the stop, satisfied in my handiwork, and decided maybe I would u-tube it, just for the hell of it.

Didn’t record.

What the HELL?

I checked my computer, and all the help files, and apparently my acer arcade and my movie maker and media player all seem to be that very specific unique version of fail that wouldn’t actually let me record myself!

Just as well. I spend long enough staring at myself in the mirror, if I could use the webcam, I’d never get any work done.

Until next time, kids, you’ve all been a wonderful audience.

Signing off,

Mud Dog